Leadership Gold Part 10 of 10: Making Critical Decisions
February 27, 2009 by dr. lam · 4 Comments
There is no time that a leader shines (or sinks) than during a crisis situation. As Maxwell says, 95% of the time, you don’t need a strong leader but that 5% is when the team rallies around the leader or dismisses him. Churchill is perhaps one of the shining exemplars of stepping up to a leadership role when the crisis in Europe was at England’s doorstep. Churchill’s entire leadership was defined by his wartime role in getting Britain to victory.
Decision making during crisis times can be very difficult. When Steve Jobs stepped in to Apple in 1997, he was confronted with a profound crisis that was about to unravel the company he founded. His leadership during this time of peril pulled Apple from the brink of disaster and infused the company with a newfound creative direction in computer design and entering the world of music that was unchartered but necessary.
Fortunately (or unfortunately), I have not had major crises, but I have had too numerous to count smaller crises in my organizations. I think one of the defining things that a leader can do is cut a valuable player when that individual bucks against the culture and causes a cancer to envelope the organization. If the leader can align the individual into the fold, then the day is saved. But if the leader cannot, the individual can destroy the morale of the company and undermine the credibility of the leader. No one person is too valuable to the organization to let go. This is a difficult thing to understand for any leader but one that I have learned and relearned the hard way for all of my organizations. The culture is king.
There is a game that I have played on EO retreats called the “green tail” or also start, stop, and continue. It is a hard one to play but should be played when there is already a deeper level of intimacy in a group and when one can “not take something personally” as one of the 4 agreements we talked about. The idea behind this is that if one person thinks you are doing something wrong, then perhaps that person is wrong and not you. If two people think you are doing something wrong, then it just might be true. If three people think you are doing something wrong, then it probably is true. The idea of the green tail is the same. If one person thinks you have a green tail, you may or may not. If two people think you have a green tail, then maybe you do. If three people think you have a green tail, then you better turn around and check. In the exercise, everyone in the group writes anonymously on a card what they want you to “start doing, stop doing, and continue doing” then they pass all the cards to the person about whom the card is written. It is not an easy exercise. I continually ask my staff if I have a green tail because I want to make sure earlier before it is too late when I need to cut off the green tail.
Maxwell calls this the “Bob phenomenon”. He had an employee whom everyone thought was just dreadful. Of course, his name was Bob. Bob obviously did not think he himself was terrible. However, who was wrong? Of course, Bob. One of the critical roles of a leader is not to let a Bob survive in the organization if he is behaving like Bob.
Leadership Gold Part 9 of 10: Getting the Meeting Done Before the Meeting
February 26, 2009 by dr. lam · 4 Comments
Maxwell is full of practical advice. My major goal this year is to schedule consistent monthly meetings for the entire year, which I have already done. I have also done that for my salon and spa. One thing that Maxwell talks about is having a meeting before the meeting with your key players. I am now soliciting ideas and advice from my key players and from all players well in advance of the meeting for several reasons.
First, I want to know what is on their mind before I walk through that door. That helps me avoid being blindsided by something in public that we should have probably addressed in private first. Second, it brings clarity to the subject so that the person bringing it up can have a “coach” before the meeting. That is what we do in my EO forum. When someone is going to present the following month, the presenter undergoes intense coaching from last month’s presenter (or from someone who is well versed in the presenter’s subject matter) so that the presenter can achieve clarity and focus before walking into the meeting. In fact, a bad presentation in my forum can be blamed as much on the presenter as it can on the coach who failed to coach the presenter adequately. Third, meeting key players before the meeting will help elicit a coalition so that there is relative unanimity on a subject before going in so that we are all not in a bickering mood. Fourth, it helps create a continuity so that the meeting is not just a single isolated happening once a month. I actually have weekly meetings for my spa and even shorter meetings almost every day since my spa is in a growth trajectory. As I have mentioned in a previous blog, accountability is very hard to have on a monthly basis. A weekly basis or shorter interval is necessary for any real level of accountability to be had.
I know this topic is one in which it seems pretty focused on a business owner trying to lead his/her staff. However, I think this subject can be applicable at many levels even for non-business owners or non business people all together. For example, if you are a staff member, you might want to make sure that a task is being completed on time, so you set up regular meetings to make sure that things are progressing well. You would then personally meet with your team members between these established meetings to make sure everything is in fact on track.
In my EO forum, I have learned a valuable trick that does not breach confidentiality (which is sacred to me and my forum group). Some of my forum members actually carry out family meetings on a weekly basis in which even the kids lead the meetings. This teaches children a leadership role early on and allows them to learn how to delegate, assume responsibility, run a meeting, and be on time. Obviously, the parent could run the meeting too. Even spouses together can have a family meeting if there are no children in the family. There are many versions, permutations, and merits to a meeting, but the focus of this blog is understanding the merit of the meeting before the meeting. Maxwell is simply brilliant and insightful.
Leadership Gold Part 8 of 10: People Quit People, Not Companies
February 25, 2009 by dr. lam · 7 Comments
This is perhaps one of the toughest things to own up to. I like the saying, “People join companies, but they leave managers.” I try to always remember that. When someone wants to leave a job, too often we as leaders just blame the person or the amorphous identity of the organization. However, it might very well be our own fault. Typically, I look at myself to see what I am doing wrong and an exit interview can be very helpful to see whether I was the problem even unwittingly in the calamity.
A leader must have natural skills as a leader that rank above the leadership capacity of those under him/her. A person of a leadership capacity of 8 will not follow a leader who is sitting at a 3. It is the law of respect. When the staff cannot respect the leader, they will leave and gravitate around a stronger leader that can lead them the right way. The law of respect follows the law of competency. When a leader is incompetent or less competent than a staff member, the staff member must per force leave. It is almost impossible to work for someone above you who really should be beneath you. I learn a lot from my sister. She has oftentimes complained in the past (repeatedly) that she could not follow her leader because he/she was simply incompetent. The entire team knew he/she was incompetent but the leader didn’t.
At the same time, I have learned a very valuable lesson on the flip side. When someone is not happy or wants to leave, bless them to leave. Do not try to negotiate a better salary, perks, promise this or that, just let them leave. Even though quality people are great finds when you find them, they are replaceable. That sounds harsh, but it is true. What Maxwell says is that a poor leader will have a very limited pool of people to draw from, but a great leader will have a huge pool of people to draw from. Now, that does not mean that I am not fiercely loyal to my staff. My staff is fiercely loyal to me, and I to them. It just means let people go when they need to go, a hard lesson for me but one that I realize is a truism that must be understood and lived. Also, listening to Rand Stagen give a talk about company life cycles (both depressing and exhilarating), he mentioned that an employee of his was recruited to go elsewhere. He was of course not thrilled with it, but he realized that he could and would remain loyal to his staff that chose to leave. He would endorse him and still stay proud of who that staff member was and would be…even outside the context of his company. I hope my staff never leave me, but if they do I won’t put up a fight. I will bless them on their way if they have better opportunities than what I have to offer them.
Leadership Gold Part 7 of 10: Look, Listen, Ask
February 24, 2009 by dr. lam · 17 Comments
When John Maxwell has a meeting, he puts a tiny “L” at the corner of one of his pages to remind him to listen. He adds another “L” next to it for look, i.e., look at the person you are listening to. I myself am perhaps the most guilty of wanting to dominate a conversation and failing to listen. Perhaps I can blame my XY chromosome, as most men fail in this endeavor. My mom says I don’t listen to her very well. Well, I am trying at this endeavor and want to improve in this department of weakness of mine. More about my weaknesses further down.
A leader should be actively listening to his staff to get pertinent feedback, encourage creative ideas and to use that information as a source of ways to improve the team. Without encouraging other voices, a meeting or an encounter becomes a fruitless exercise. Just one voice screaming out his opinion. That is also why I value input and responses in these blogs. (In fact, I have designed this website uniquely to have as many voices on here as possible, e.g., on my blogs, forum posts, before and after gallery and soon to be on the videos too.) Two minds are always better than one. How about a thousand? I have made it a concerted effort to begin listening better and to conduct a meeting with more openness. My last meeting with my salon director was spent 80% of the time quiet just listening to the problems, prospects, and thoughts of my director so that I could learn what was going on and to better grasp if the direction taken was the right one.
I am combining another part of Maxwell’s dictums into one for the sake of trying to cram 23 of his ideas into 10 blogs. He says a great leader knows what questions to ask. The biggest question to ask is, “What mistakes am I making?” That is a tough one to ask and to hear. It is an important one. One person came up to Maxwell after a lecture and said, “Mr. Maxwell, a leader must put up a strong front and never show his weaknesses.” Maxwell retorted, “You are assuming your staff does not already know your weaknesses. They do. Once you admit them, they are reassured that you know yourself and they don’t have to keep pretending that you don’t know.” When a leader admits his own weaknesses, he can then ask the staff to “pushback”, i.e., to give opinions in a free forum to help with the organization. He should encourage a roundtable discussion free of rejection and fear from a leader’s dismissive remarks.
I myself am constantly working to open up my weaknesses to my staff. What are they? First and foremost, I am not a great administrator. That is why Dianne and Constanze work as my principal administrators but also everyone around them work as their own administrators. When we had a vacuum for someone to help with ordering, Darla stepped in and took over. When Vassilka realized that photo taking and transferring was something that she could do well and efficiently, she took that over without my even asking. When I couldn’t fit all my hair transplant consults now until May, Constanze looked at a creative way to get them in earlier and Emina stepped up to help. I want to thank my team for every small and big thing they do because I notice each and everything they do, and I am flabbergasted at the quality of Team LFP.
What are my strengths besides plastic surgery? I am a connector and I care. I love people, simply put. Therefore, I constantly work to engage my team and put them together on equal footing to excel. However, I realized that my weakness as an administrator did not permit me to resign my task as CEO. I now am constantly meeting with my administrators to make sure that they are not alone in their task. I have weekly (sometimes every other day meetings with my spa director); I ask my nursing administrator what things are going on that I need to know about; and I meet with my salon director once a month and get feedback from him once or twice a week on matters usually by phone. I am focused now on asking what am I doing wrong and what could I do better.
Leadership Gold Part 6 of 10: Helping Others
February 23, 2009 by dr. lam · 3 Comments
Many times, leaders assume their leadership position merely for the material gain or posturing that such a title affords, e.g., the corner office or a respected status. However, all great leaders in the history of mankind have one thing in common: they have made a difference. Leadership provides an individual the capacity to help others in ways that he or she could not do as well outside of a leadership position. I like how John Maxwell summarized the main objective of leadership: helping others. That is beautifully put.
I feel that in my position of leadership that I have your attention so that with hundreds of people reading my blog every day I get an audience that I can directly impact. I can’t tell you how great that feels. Your blog responses mean the world to me. It means that I am getting through. It means I am connecting, and we are connecting with one another. When I work with my staff, I am so proud that I know that I am giving them a great place to work so that they in turn can help others. I feel that we all in turn share that leadership position so that we can then lead others. I like the saying, “Leaders lead leaders.” By leading my staff to impart the ethical, passionate, and creative approach to patient care, they then carry out that mission.
I hope that all of you assume the mantle of leadership in small and great ways. Remember that to be a leader you just need two things: direction and followers. That does not necessarily make you a good leader but just a leader. If you want to be a leader, ask yourself what direction are you taking your followers? Do you have any followers to begin with? Are you taking them on a selfish direction for personal gain? Or are you sticking with Maxwell’s basic tenet of leadership, that all great leadership is focused on helping others?