Human Relations & Leadership Part 3 of 3: Leading by Emotional Intelligence
October 30, 2008 by dr. lam · Leave a Comment
Heart Math
As I alluded to in Tuesday’s blog, a leader is an individual that commands quiet respect without having to ask for it. The person who needs to ask for it most likely does not own it or deserve it. Leaders however are not born in many cases and are not born out of crisis. Instead, they are mentored by someone more senior than they are who have inspired them to be leaders. I have had many mentors. As mentioned before, Ed Williams was my singular hero who taught me my flaws more indelibly and who showed me a path that I needed to see.
Along those lines, when a leader leads because he or she naturally draws people into a followership position, it is important that the leader not drag down his or her staff through negative emotional energy. In fact, a strong leader will draw down everyone’s energy unwittingly in many cases. Oftentimes, anyone within 15 feet of this leader will either be buoyed by his or her presence or demoralized by it without that leader actually opening his or her mouth. In It’s Your Ship (a book given to me by my nurse Beth to read), the author suggests that if you are the leader and you are not having the best day, get out of the way and allow your followers freedom not to be shackled by your emotional slavery, albeit unintentional.
Also as I have mentioned, we are all leaders in many respects and we all draw and give energy to those around us. That is part of the reason that I started the “Tell me about your passions” forum to just have fun with imparting a little happiness and joy through related passions. The California group Heart Math has claimed that the electromagnetic forces of our hearts radiate about 15 feet around us and when our energies are low and negative we impart that out to those who are in our proximity. Accordingly, to buoy those around us rather than to anchor them downward, center your emotional gravity first before you inflict that negative energy on all those who see you. Over time if your energies are sustained negatively, you will either attract those who thrive on negative energy or you will polarize away all those who embrace positivity.
I think that is why in large part my patients are happy ones because I attract those kinds of patients, who are inherently happy individuals. I think as much joy as my patients get from seeing me, I in return attain the same level of joy in seeing my patients. My patients are truly the driving force behind why I wake up every morning and enjoy coming to work. For all of you out there who struggle with negative energy, remember that whatever energy we think we are containing within us actually can affect all of those in near proximity to us even without our knowing it (or at times their knowing it). The stronger an emotional force you are as a human being the more effect you will have on those around you, positively or negatively. I hope you will learn to radiate positive energy around you by being, thinking, and feeling as positively as you can every day.