The Power of Intention Part 10 of 10: Intentionality
March 13, 2009 by dr. lam · 14 Comments
I conclude this 2 week series with an exercise that I found very meaningful during my EO retreat to Marble Falls a few weeks ago and that I thought I would pass along to you. Carl Reynolds, our retreat planner (great job Carl!), put this exercise together so it does not come from Wayne Dyer’s book. Intentionality is, believe it or not, a real word. However, the philosophical construct behind it is quite difficult for the armchair philosopher in me to decode. I welcome comments. In this case, we are going to treat the word intentionality and intention the same. My goal is simply to have you perform this exercise either in private or in this blog if you are so inclined. I will publish my own answers below. I hope you can skip my answers and come up with your own, then read my answers. Here we go:
PART I
Intentionality: ”When your dreams and your values are in alignment and your actions progress you towards your vision with constant purpose.”
Dreams: In this exercise we are going to dream. Take money out of the equation. what would you do with your time? Travel? Volunteer? Teach, consult, raise your kids yourself, etc. Write down a list of those activities that you would do if you had the time…Dream big or as small as you want to…. (10 minutes)
-Teach plastic surgery
-Public speaking
-Write a lay press book
-Workout every day to get more fit
-Volunteer to mentor bright young minds
-Engage in more concerted spa retreats and continue with my personal growth
PART II
Values: Now we are going to list our values. Take a moment and write down at least 5 values that are core to you. (5 minutes)
1. Passion
2. Integrity
3. Work ethic/Rest- Balance
4. Compassion/Love
5. Happiness/Positivity
PART III
Filter: List two of the dreams that make it through your value filter. (2 minutes)
1. Continue with my personal growth and achieve better balance in my life.
2. Volunteer/mentor young minds
PART IV
At this point we now have two dreams that have made it through your filter. Our next step is to be intentional in putting together an action plan that brings these important dreams to fruition. But first, describe one or two times when you knew you were in alignment with your values and your purpose. What pulled you away from that alignment? What keeps you from getting back to that alignment? Be specific. (15 min.)
I felt that my staff has been in alignment with me in the past. I felt that I was not as attuned to their needs this past year, which I have now changed. I am part of multiple accountability groups that have weekly and monthly goals. I fear not being the best leader that I can be. I fear that I will not grow personally to my satisfaction.
PART V
Intentionality: Create an action plan for one of the dreams that made it through the filter. List at least 5 activities that will need to be scheduled so that you are intentionally working towards accomplishing that goal. (15 min.)
1. Schedule body rehabilitation time including monthly rolf sessions and weekly massage therapies.
2. Dedicate one weekend day a month completely free of any thought toward work and make it entirely fun.
3. Make sure that I have built in weekly yoga and spin classes, every single week unless I am out of town.
4. Continue to work every week on creative ideas toward making effective blogs and hold myself accountable for what I write.
5. To move away from constantly being near a computer every night but to be less anchored to my keyboard. To respond to questions and thoughts no more than twice in a given night after leaving work.
I hope you enjoyed this exercise and can hold yourself accountable for your actions. If you can’t, find someone who can. Maybe we all can be cyber buddies to keep each other in alignment with our own intentions.
The Power of Intention Part 7 of 10: Directing Your Inner Voice
March 10, 2009 by dr. lam · 8 Comments
An obstacle to intention is any manifest conflict that exists with our internal dialogue. Dyer likens this to the old Match Game in which newlyweds would try to guess what his/her partner thought or felt on a particular subject. We need to match our intention with our goal. As examples:
No Match: I hate my spouse who always acts rudely to me.
Match: I will see only love in my spouse and radiate that love to him or her.
No Match: I am poor and need money badly.
Match: I will attract abundance and be without want.
If our inner dialogue is filled with doubt, anger, despair, fear, we are holding onto a deep level of negativity that we need to let go so that we can be attuned to the universal condition of positive intention. We must achieve a peaceful inner voice and one that attracts abundance, love, creativity, i.e., in short the 7 faces of intention talked about over the past 2 weeks.
One way that Dyer talks about reaching a desirable inner voice is to meditate. We can start with the affirmation, “I want to feel good” and say it as we slowly breathe in and out and with our eyes fully closed. I have calmed nervous patients with a similar technique. I had a gentleman who came from Michigan for a scar revision and a lip reduction last week who was flustered and nervous given the fact that he had bad permanent lip injections and repeated scar revisions that failed. I don’t blame him. I put my hands onto his forehead and slowly spoke the words, “You are okay. I am right here. I want you to slow your breathing down and start to focus on the present moment.” I performed an exercise and asked where he wanted to be. He said the Maldives so we went there for a few minutes. When I came back into the room after the anesthetic had been fully in place, I asked him how he was doing. By the tone of his voice, I could tell he was already calm. He said, “I’m doing fine, doctor.”
Calm your inner voice. Feel your peace now. Exit your anxiety. Focus on abundance, love, creativity, and gratitude. Focus on where your spirit will take you. Focus on directing that inner dialogue toward a future that is bright and calm and, of course, a present time that is equally so. If you have 5 minutes right now, close your eyes and start to breathe slowly and deeply and focus on the Power of Now. Focus on gratitude and abundance. Focus on peace.
The Power of Intention Part 5 of 10: Receptivity
March 6, 2009 by dr. lam · 8 Comments
This is a favorite of mine. The intention of receptivity is almost a summary of everything that we have talked about this week. Too often we are totally focused on how are we going to achieve something. In so doing, we oftentimes circumvent our ability to achieve it because we are focused on the negative thoughts of trying to accomplish it with all of the attendant frustrations that come with a mechanical view of “how am I going to do that?”
Instead, being open and receptive will make all the difference. God and the universe will provide for you if you just allow that chance to occur. When I am with my patients, I am totally open even when I deal with seemingly difficult patients. People become aligned with my positive energy and spirit of receptivity. I like to frame it in perhaps an easier way, BE OPEN.
When we are closed, we create walls all around us. We do not connect with others, and in the process we can’t connect with ourselves. By focusing on our own problems and limitations, we remain closed. Therefore, the opposite of receptivity is resistance. If you are feeling resistance, let it go and be open to receive. By helping others with their problems (see the series on the Art of Happiness for a better understanding), we become open and receptive vessels. Today, go out and be as open as possible. Be receptive to all of those around you. Work on the intention of being open. When you become open to those around you, you will see that the needs that you thought you needed will become manifest without even trying.
The Power of Intention Part 2 of 10: Kindness
March 3, 2009 by dr. lam · 27 Comments
I wanted to start with this one because it is how I am now seeing the world. At times my ego got in the way of seeing others with utter humility and kindness. Dyer explains what he calls the 7 faces of intention: creativity, kindness, love, beauty, expansion, unlimited abundance, and receptivity. I will be covering some select topics regarding these 7 faces but will not necessarily cover all of the topics.
He argues that kindness must be a part of a universe of creation, as the Creator who made the world would not be making a malevolent one since it goes against the very nature of creation. Kindness is the energy that bonds all of us and keeps us as a unified whole, as I talked about in a previous blog on the art of happiness when I discussed compassion. You will find that I may repeat some areas through my blogs as far as topics go but there is a reason for that. First, I am exploring this topic from a different author’s perspective that in my opinion further deepens our understanding of a topic. A single blog is insufficient to make us understand AND REMEMBER what we need to know and to implement. At a fundamental core, I love teaching, always have and always will. I think teaching means giving to others information in a consistent and clear fashion so that the words and thoughts learned become integrated into life.
Okay, back to the subject. I was talking with a nurse who was frustrated about her experience in the ER and who voiced that someone threw money at her for a payment. I asked her what did she do in that circumstance. She said that she responded benevolently in giving the money back. I pushed deeper and asked, “Did you not harbor any hatred still deep in your heart, at least 10%?” She was quiet. I already knew the answer before asking because I could sense the tone in her voice carried anger and frustration.
I in turn responded that perhaps we could look at that person as an individual in pain and was calling out for help, stripped of all social rank, education, gender, age, etc., we just have a human in pain in front of us. I asked could we look at that human who treated us badly with open eyes seeing beyond all of those seemingly insurmountable trappings and get to the core of their humanity and just see them as someone who needed kindness? If we can do that we can radiate that kindness to those who really need it and we can then fill ourselves with that love and positivity that makes it easier for us to survive the day and to make it a more pleasurable experience.
I like this expression that Dyer says, “When we hurt others, we must hurt ourselves. When we help others, we will invariably also help ourselves.” (paraphrasing that a bit.) That is such a profound expression. I remember every time that I wanted to be malicious toward another, I felt sick inside and it literally hurt me to do it. It tore me apart. Whenever I have given generously to help someone else, I feel an exhilaration that strengthens me.
If we go into the world with a sense of hatred, anxiety, and fear in the morning, we will create that world as a manifest destiny. If we stop for a moment in the morning and see others with love, compassion, and kindness, we will be able to make a small but profound difference in all who come near us. When you go out today try to let go of all hatred toward humanity, negativity, and for a moment look at the person in front of you as a human being in pain and get to the core of their pain by offering them kindness. You will see that you can create your own world in a profoundly meaningful way and make your life and the life of those around you a meaningful and positive experience. Make a difference today.
Perform an act of kindness and don’t share that you did that with anyone. Keep it to yourself. See how you feel. Look at every human you encounter with love, compassion, and kindness. Open your heart today.
The Power of Intention Part 1 of 10: Defining Intention
March 2, 2009 by dr. lam · 6 Comments
I think we are naturally drawn to a subject by what might appear to be happenstance or in fact might reflect a need in our lives. I was talking with Carl Reynolds, a member in my EO forum group, a few months ago about an exercise in which his wife and he attained great meaning in their life called “Intentionality” and which we actually performed in my EO retreat last week (and I will present this exercise for your consideration at the conclusion of this series). It coincided with my reading Wayne Dyer’s book, The Power of Intention, and it got me to start understanding the power of intention and what it can do in our lives. My first reading of Dyer’s book (I have now covered the book 3 times) was a somewhat limited response, as the topic seemed simply too amorphous for me. The more I thought about it and started to implement it into my life and clinical practice, the more that I thought it was simply amazing. Accordingly, I shall be doing an extensive 2-week blog series on Dyer’s thoughts with a lot of my perceptions thrown in. As all my blogs, this is not a rehashing of his book. You need to read his book if you want all of his thoughts. This represents how I perceive the key elements of his book as it relates to me and perhaps that would rub off on you, the reader, as you explore your own ways for self development.
I like to think of an athlete whose pent-up energy can be pushed in one direction or another depending on which way his feet are planted and ready to be launched. If one’s feet are planted in one direction, it takes more energy to switch and move in an opposite direction. Similarly, if our intention is aimed toward a certain direction, we might more easily carry ourselves toward the path of least resistance and move toward that direction. For example, “I will certainly get sick this weekend because there is a flu going around.” Is that not a self-fulfilling prophecy? How about, “I am physically fit and will withstand all illnesses.” The power of intention allows us to create our world the way that we want to and not be dictated by external circumstances.
As Dyer opens his book, he uses the conventional definition of intention (just to get that out of the way): ”My research reveals a fairly common definition of intention as a strong purpose or aim, accompanied by a determination to produce a desired result.” He further imagines someone with great will and determination to overcome insurmountable obstacles. In short, an overachiever. In fact, this is not what he is talking about in his book. He is focused more on what Patanjali suggested more than 20 centuries ago: ”Dormant forces, faculties, and talents come alive, and you discover yourself to be a greater person by far than you ever dreamed yourself to be.” The idea is more focused on this concept that it is an energy state (more about that next week) than anything else. That energy state resides in you and resides all around you. I love his idea of energy states and it will be important to understand this idea in bringing to life one’s own power of intention.
Dyer aims to move ourselves out of being isolated life forces but into a connection through a larger life force, or “universal spirit” or “universal mind” of intention. Thanks Paul P last week for your insightful comments to my blogs. As promised, here is our “coincidence”, which does not mean happenstance, but a “fitting together perfectly”, i.e., we are harmonizing on the same wavelength or energy state. As the idea of intention unravels in front of you this week, repeat almost as a mantra the words “intention” and “intent” today to get you moving toward the spirit of intention. When you enter a state of anxiety or fear, repeat those words and start to connect with a universal life force and enter a peaceful state.